ARE YOU BUYING AFFECTION?

Do you use money to buy affection and approval from your friends, family, and children?

• Get real about why you’re doing what you’re doing.  What’s stopping you from dealing with the real issue?  Why not deal with it instead of going shopping?  What does persistent buying teach your family?
• Don’t underestimate children; they’ll learn from your actions.  A real contribution would be to balance your life so you can be there for them.  Don’t try to justify that you are dealing with it by “buying” their love.
• Most likely, your behavior is a result of the guilt you feel for not having enough time to spend with your children.  Buying is a false substitute and an illusion.
• Life is about compromise.  You must figure out a way to maximize your time with your family by putting yourself in debt, you put their future in jeopardy and make the problem worse.
• Be honest.  Ask yourself, “How insulting is this to me that I have to buy my way into every relationship?”
• Step up and say, “If they like me, they like me.”  It’s better to be healthy alone than sick with someone else.  And if you have to pay somebody to like you, they’re not much of a friend.
• Deal with this problem emotionally, not financially.  When you quit hiding behind gifts, you’ll be forced to deal with your real problem.

GREAT GIRLFRIENDS!

Gather your girlfriends for laughs, love and lots of fun! Celebrate friendship with ideas from these girl groups—whether it's a book club, cooking club or a weekend at the spa

Get Pampered

Get your girlfriends together for a weekend of relaxing, shopping and eating! Pick a getaway that's easily accessible for all of you, and make a retreat of it! Get pampered at the spa, take a trip to the shopping district and eat at the best restaurants. The weekend will surely energize all of you!

Charity Ladies

Turn your girls' night out into a day to give back to the community. Spend time volunteering at school, churches, soup kitchens or day care centers. Strengthen the bond of friendship and get a lesson in compassion!

Book Club

If you and several friends are already interested in reading, your book club is well on its way! Each month, have a different person pick the book that the group will read. Agree on a location for your meetings—whether it's a restaurant, library, or your living room, you're bound to have a great time.

If you choose to always have them at your friends' homes, make the gathering even more fun by deciding on a theme for refreshments!

Traveling Buddies

Leave the family and the job for a few days every year and go on a getaway with your girlfriends. Spend time researching the type of place you all want to go (Beach? Mountains? Big city?) and what you want to do (Relax? Shop? Tour?). Remember, half the fun is in the planning!

RECONNECTING WITH THE FAMILY

Some days it may seem like there aren't enough hours in the day to squeeze in professional, personal and family obligations. Don't let life's juggling act distract you from what's truly important…the people you love. Gather around the dinner table with your children or plan a road trip with your grandmother. Building strong family bonds will keep your loved ones connected for generations.

No time for a family vacation? You can start connecting with loved ones by expressing your feelings more often…whether it's with a big bear hug or a simple "I love you." Cherish the quality time you have with your family and try to avoid petty disagreements.

Do you know the story behind your great-aunt's secret recipe? Holidays are the perfect time to find out! Many families come together to celebrate major holidays and share foods that have been passed down from generation to generation. Ask your elders to share the stories behind your favorite family traditions and foods with the children at the dinner table. This helps instill a sense of family pride.

Remember, you don't have to wait for a holiday to build a tradition around food! Whether it's pizza, spaghetti or hot dogs, designate one night a week for your kid's favorite dinner—and have them help in the preparation!

Banish all portable music players and DVDs from your car, and hit the highway for an old-fashioned family road trip. Back in the good old days, families entertained themselves with sing-alongs and car games.

When your children get antsy in the backseat, pull over for a roadside picnic or unpack the fishing poles and try to catch a "keeper." At the end of the trip, you're sure to have family photos and memories that will last a lifetime.

THOUGHTS ON MEN!!!

Oprah Winfrey’s thoughts on men

If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away.
If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay.
Stop making excuses for a man and his behaviour.
Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache .

Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that's not meant to be. Slower is better.
Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy.

If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can't "be friends ".
A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend.
Don't settle .

If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is. Don't stay because you think "it will get better ."

You'll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better.
The only person you can control in a relationship is you.

Avoid men who've got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women.
He didn't marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently?

Always have your own set of friends separate from his.
Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. If something bothers you, speak up.

Never let a man know everything.* He will use it against you later.

You cannot change a man's behaviour.* Change comes from within.

Don't EVER make him feel he is more important than you are... even if he has more education or in a better job .

Do not make him into a quasi-god.
He is a man, nothing more nothing less.
Never let a man define who you are.
Never borrow someone else's man.
If he cheated with you, he'll cheat on you.

A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you.
All men are NOT dogs.

You should not be the one doing all the bending...compromise is two way street.

You need time to heal between relationships ...there is nothing cute about baggage... deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship

You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you...a relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals...look for someone complimentary...not supplementary.

Dating is fun..even if he doesn't turn out to be Mr. Right.
Make him miss you sometimes...when a man always know where you are, and you're always readily available to him - he takes it for granted.

Never move into his mother's house. Never co-sign for a man.
Don't fully commit to a man who doesn't give you everything that you need.* Keep him in your radar but get to know others .

Scared of being alone is what makes a lot of women stay in relationships that are abusive or hurtful : Dr Phill

You should know that you're the best thing that could ever happen to
anyone and if a man mistreats you, he'll miss out on a good thing. If he was attracted to you in the 1 st place, just know that he's not the only one. They're all watching you, so you have a lot of choices. Make the right one.

Ladies take care of your own hearts....

Share this with other women and men (just so they know)...

My trip to the Mamanucas!

This was an excellent trip.  Taitusi John & I used to host the breakfast show on Radio Fiji Gold and was asked by Treasure Island Resort to do one of our shows on the island in the Mamanucas.  It was a fantastic idea so we went ahead and did it.  We had a fabulous time.  The staff @ Treasure Island Resort are the best.  They made us feel welcome .  Hey did you know that this is the only resort (besides their sister resort - Bounty Island) that has fresh water in the Mamanucas?  Yep and lots of it.  Nothing like fresh water after a day swimming in salt water.  We all went on a day trip around the Mamanucas and vinaka vaka levu to Mr Chef for our basket of yummy goodies for the trip...we had a fabulous time.  We stopped @ Castaway Island Resort for 30 mins to see Ligo Reece a keen listener on RFG and had a few yummy cocktails, we stopped to say hi to Mere and the staff @ Plantation Island Resort & Musket Cove, Malolo, etc   The next day before heading to Vuda landing we stopped for lunch @ Bounty Island Resort and had a great time with the friendly staff....oh yeah staff from Treasure island that were on a day off came along to join us as well.  Thank you for a memorable trip.  We will be back.